Reconsider the diet

Dear Big Lady

Iz sorry bout upchuck on white sofa, upchuck on white carpet, upchuck on you best non-washable jumper what had fall on floor.

Iz not sure what means: "why can't bloody throw up on bloody tiled floor what easy to clean instead go all way into bloody lounge FGS" but Doglet iz v apologeticking.

Iz think most probably not got nuffink to do with inhale food in 3 secs but iz more likely upchucking iz allergy to new YUK LOW FAT dogfood.  what iz LOW FAT?

Iz not understand.

IZ TASTE LIKE BLEEDIN CRAP

Regards,
Doglet

Finn is not especially quick off the mark when it comes to supper time

Dear Big Lady

Iz do not know why you get so cross shouty shouty bout Doglet iz keep eat CAT food.  Him iz v slow eater, iz deliberate chew each mouthful 156 times make Doglet suffer what have gulped own food in 2 mouthful while CAT been eat for 3.5 hours and still be chewchewchew, while Doglet stand there say "iz need some help CAT?  iz more food there than you iz manage? iz let Doglet know anytime if think would need assistance" but him just keep chewchewchew look malevolent and threaten.

Doglet iz merely help he out.  Kind Doglet.

Regards
Doglet