Dear Big Lady
When you iz say "oh doglet, shall we iz go out for lovely long walk, you iz can roll in mud and leaves and twiggy bitses and pieces and you iz can sniff as much disgusting unidentified manky stuff as you please" you iz did NOT AT ANY POINT mention you iz was planning give me bleedin' bath afterwards.
Iz been on phone to Woof Solicitors what say iz entrapment and cruel & unusual punishment. So take this as warning.
If you iz need me again today, I iz shall be sulking under eyebrowziz looking glum.
Regards
Doglet
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