Iz writin on behalf Doglet.
I iz not Doglet, no, iz big legal orfority. Iz time somedoggy tell you what dogs iz got Canine Rights. Iz got right to go upstairs, schloof on beds, schloof on chairs, etc.
Iz mud? NO. Iz leafy bits from gardin? NO. Iz small bits of unidentified manky dead mouse/bird? NO! Iz just fluffy Doglet. So what is you complaining bout?
I iz, I mean, Doglet iz going to stay wiv nice friend while you iz THINK about what you iz done. Doglet iz come back when you iz ready talk. Or when food iz run out.
Yours truly,
Woof Solicitors
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